True stories with a twist!


images-1In a wedding announcement today, the New York Times quoted a bride delivering her own wedding vows.  Her closing lines were “As long as I can walk I will dance with you. I will bake you apple pies and never wear flannel nightgowns.”

OK: hold on a minute. Stop right there. I know you mean well and want to be romantic on this special day, but why misalign flannel nightgowns? They are being framed for no good reason. Somebody has to defend them.

You live in New Hampshire, where a good old flannel nightgown plus warm socks would be a great idea. I won’t go as far as suggesting wearing a night cap to bed, but otherwise I take exception to your vow. Sorry, bride-lady, but since you’re 59 years old, a little warmth at night might put you in a good mood when you snuggle up to new hubby. And I bet he’ll thank you for not putting your ice cold, freezing feet on his nice warm body.

Or are you more the Victoria’s Secret, sexbomb type? That may be great in July, but talk to me again in February and give me your answer then. If frigid smoke is coming out of your mouth when you speak, try a flannel nightgown.

Or are you a fuel wasting lady who keeps her house at 75 degrees and could walk around naked without breaking into a singe goosebump? Wear a flannel nightgown and help save the planet and fossil fuel.

I stand up for flannel nightgowns. They are soft, cuddly, and old fashioned. They bring a sense of history and stability. Perhaps you are having hot flashes at 59, and that’s why you’re warm enough to abhor flannel nightgowns. But soon, when they pass, you will be longing for something comfortable and comforting to wear as you and your sweetie cuddle up in bed to watch the new edition of “Downton Abbey.”images-7

You can find a pretty one on line!

Comments on: "WEDDING VOW" (54)

  1. Enjoy soft, comfy flannel pajamas on a cold winter’s night. But think that was a very strange thing to be part of your wedding vows. With that for starters, hope they don’t have too many more rules to follow in their marriage.

  2. You don’t need to keep this comment, but I think in your second paragraph you meant malign rather than misalign.

  3. I quite love flannel nightgowns though I don’t wear them! 🙂 And I do wear hair nets to sleep! 😉

  4. Nooooo. What’s next flannel sheets? 🙂

  5. I’m all for the flannel sheets. She could cheat by using those and still keep her vows. Just be careful what you wish for.

    Loved your post, Ronnie.

  6. Loved this funny and charming post, Ronnie. And this line especially: “Wear a flannel nightgown and help save the planet and fossil fuel.” You have such a way with words.

  7. So I guess feety pajamas are out of the question for this bride…

  8. fransiweinstein said:

    Haha! I read that same announcement and thought, “you’re trying too hard to be clever”. She doesn’t live in New Hampshire anymore, though. She moved to California when they started dating.

    • If its southern California I can understand why she wouldn’t like flannel nightgowns. Otherwise, it’s a good thing she’s not privy to my dresser drawer.

      • fransiweinstein said:

        Haha! Regardless hers were very strange vows. Can’t say I loved her head thing either. But as long as they’re happy what does it matter, right?

  9. I sure won’t want to be a fashionista if what I wear exposes me to harsh weather (cold, for instance). I am with you 100 percent and must add that I see a lot of wisdom in what you’ve written. Ronnie, how do you always manage to crack me up? 🙂

    • I don’t know, Uzo. I just tell it as I see it. Maybe the world is really a very funny place. Or the part that I try to focus on. I’m glad that you get a chuckle, as I get goose bumps from reading your scary stories.

  10. Great post! I agree- a weird comment for a bridal vow. I wear long sleeve cotton nightgowns– even with the heat down and the window open no matter the temperature, I’m too warm in flannel. (now).

  11. I agree with you Ronnie… want a hot woman in bed.?? Let her be warm…. cold is a real sex killer… anyway it’s part of the fun trying to get to what’s underneath..

  12. I’m not a fan of fashion, but at least I kinda get it when you are out and about. But at home!?!?!? Why would anyone care what they wore in the confines of their own castle? I wonder if they make straightjackets in flannel?

  13. With you all the way Ronnie… how can you possibly feel sexy if you’re frozen? no, flannel nighties are the way to go for any number of good reasons, which we all know… nothing wrong with bed-socks either if you’re a frozen feet victim…
    This was fun, your wit and your followers comments !!!

    • Thanks, Valerie. I’m glad you mentioned the readers’ comments. Sometimes they’re as entertaining as the post. And I am glad that you see things my way!

  14. haha, this one had me cracking up!

  15. Hahahahahaha !!! Loved this. Funny, funny, funny! Great post, Ronnie

  16. Anonymous said:

    Ronnie – You are amazing There is no subject where your marvelous wit gives a lovely twist to the situation – Gaye

  17. Anonymous said:

    Sound advice at any age,unless you live in Florida,but then again?

  18. and flannel sheets, i love flannel sheets! c

  19. Gail Fishman Gerwin said:

    Is she trying to put Lanz out of business? Nothing like baking an apple pie in a wisp of a nightie. And if I’d only known prior to my wedding where she got her headpiece . . .

    • I think the one thing many of us would change about our wedding dresses is the headpiece… but those were the styles in the 60’s.

  20. Anonymous said:

    Get an electric blanket and wear something sexier orNOTHING to bed,,

  21. Flannel pjs are my favorite! Too bad it’s too hot in Texas to wear them much. I would if I could. And my husband doesn’t mind them at all.

  22. I support warm comfy socks. Cold feet on the back are the fastest way to prevent any further bodily contact.

    • I could totally understand that. If I were ever warm I would hate it if anyone put cold feet on me. It may be worse than snoring.

  23. Chuckling here Ronnie, and laughing… especially over the cold feet syndrome… It struck a cord on my P.Js…. 🙂
    Hope you are well… sending you a Hug.
    Sue xox

  24. and what’s wrong with night caps? 🙂 They keep your head warm.

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