In a wedding announcement today, the New York Times quoted a bride delivering her own wedding vows. Her closing lines were “As long as I can walk I will dance with you. I will bake you apple pies and never wear flannel nightgowns.”
OK: hold on a minute. Stop right there. I know you mean well and want to be romantic on this special day, but why misalign flannel nightgowns? They are being framed for no good reason. Somebody has to defend them.
You live in New Hampshire, where a good old flannel nightgown plus warm socks would be a great idea. I won’t go as far as suggesting wearing a night cap to bed, but otherwise I take exception to your vow. Sorry, bride-lady, but since you’re 59 years old, a little warmth at night might put you in a good mood when you snuggle up to new hubby. And I bet he’ll thank you for not putting your ice cold, freezing feet on his nice warm body.
Or are you more the Victoria’s Secret, sexbomb type? That may be great in July, but talk to me again in February and give me your answer then. If frigid smoke is coming out of your mouth when you speak, try a flannel nightgown.
Or are you a fuel wasting lady who keeps her house at 75 degrees and could walk around naked without breaking into a singe goosebump? Wear a flannel nightgown and help save the planet and fossil fuel.
I stand up for flannel nightgowns. They are soft, cuddly, and old fashioned. They bring a sense of history and stability. Perhaps you are having hot flashes at 59, and that’s why you’re warm enough to abhor flannel nightgowns. But soon, when they pass, you will be longing for something comfortable and comforting to wear as you and your sweetie cuddle up in bed to watch the new edition of “Downton Abbey.”
You can find a pretty one on line!