The recent news report that President Trump wants to buy the island of Greenland gave me a great idea. He is an endless source of original ideas; not many people think the way he does. In fact he often surprises us with his thoughts.
But his offer was immediately rebuffed, with Greenland insistingly claiming that their island was absolutely not for sale.
Where did Trump get the idea that Greenland was for sale to the United States?
Certainly not through private, secret, inside information. Never would I make any accusations about our president, an outstanding businessman, he tells us, being in any way involved in insider trading. Everyone knows that insider trading is illegal. Many infamous stock traders got themselves into deep trouble, making buy and sell decisions based on insider trading. Of course Trump would never be part of anything illegal such as that!
So it must be that his information source came up with the wrong information. Was the research the work of one of the young, inexperienced winners of his former television show, “The Apprentice?” Perhaps one of those employees who, like many other Trump staff employees, were subsequently fired?
I admire creative thinkers; employees with new ideas. It must be very brave to present an untried idea to our president and run the risk of being tweeted into oblivion.
So the embarrassing offer to buy Greenland, which is clearly not now or has ever for sale, gave me an idea to boost my own investment portfolio.
I am working out the minute details of my plan, which is to put in an offer in to buy one of the Hawaiian Islands. I don’t expect too much; just one of the smaller islands. It couldn’t have much strategic significance to our defense plans, so it couldn’t mean terribly much to the government. And the sound of young children, like my grandchildren and their friends, giggling and laughing, romping through the waves, would greatly boost the morales of any military staff within earshot. Once in a while I might even invite them over to my little island for a neighborly barbecue.
So I have great enthusiasm and high hopes that President Donald Trump will agree to my unusual request and agree to sell me one of the tiny, insignificant Hawaiian Islands.
I don’t think it would be too expensive, do you?